Friday, August 31, 2012

Mid-year Resolutions Update

Just a reminder of how much I love the season!

It's been awhile since the last time I updated you all about my resolutions... so, here ya go!

Things I've done well:

Overall I think I've done quite alright over the summer. I'm still posting on here at least once a month (go me!), I've been reading like a fiend, I've been working on my spiritual life, and I've celebrated all of the Sabbats, which is not small feat considering I'm outrageously unorganized. On the holiday front, I do need to start planning Mabon which will hopefully be a little bit easier once we have an altar (one day....). I'm thinking this is a good time to do some much needed cleaning and organizing-- our room is outrageously messy, and every time I look at it I get so overwhelmed that I just pretend the mess isn't there and watch Dr. Who.  This must end!  It needs to be clean!  So I think for getting ready for Mabon should be all about getting shit cleaned up (and maybe not just physically but spiritually as well, yes?).

As far as exercise goes, I've been pretty consistent about going to the gym 4 days a week (with the exception of last week, when I didn't go at all). Every time I go I think NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I don't want to move my feet one more step, I don't want to move my arms or my legs anymore, it's time for a nap... and every time I still pull myself by my bootstraps and work out, so that's gotta count for something. And, at my last batch of bloodwork shows that all the changes I've made are definitely working to my advantage.  Taking my vitamins? Goodbye vitamin D deficiency! Doing weight training? Hello, muscles I didn't know I had! Eating more iron-rich foods? Why yes, I'd love to have more energy during the day with no crashing associated with lots of carbs and sugar!  So, overall, good things are happening.

Happy Dance!

Things that need improvement:

I'm still not satisfied with the amount of time I spend reflecting on myself spiritually and connecting with the Divine-- for me that mostly means prayer, although I could stand to spend some time meditating or going on nature walks and stuff like that, especially now that we're journeying through the dark half of the year-- I always get restless and excited around this time of the year, and I tend to be my most spiritually aware at this time.  So I'm just itching to be out and about in nature, walking under the trees, smelling the grass, looking at all of the plants and wildlife.  This is my time of year!  Anyway, I'm not totally disappointed, because I've been a little more consistent with prayer, but I do recognize that there are days where I don't devote enough time to reflect and just BE. And that's one of the reasons I like prayer and meditation so much, because I get to stop moving a million miles a minute and just be in my body and be thankful for what I have and ask for guidance or whatever it is I feel lacking in that moment.

I also haven't been doing a whole lot of recreational writing (so no, I don't have a book in the making...), but again, it's the dark half of the year and suddenly I feel the urge to write about everything that I'm feeling, and I'm giddy with excitement about it.  I've been writing prayers and poems and also beginning to work on songs (some spiritual, some secular), and it's a really cathartic and rewarding experience. I just have this sudden need to write about how autumn and winter feel to me, my experiences with the leaves changing and the earlier sunsets and all that.  Also, music is such an important part of my life, and I want to be able to sing as a way of connecting with the Divine, but I find that a lot of the "pagan" song I have heard just don't resonate with me.  They lack a certain sincerity, perhaps, a realness; they feel contrived.  When I sing them it feels like I'm playing pretend on the playground-- I'm trying to be this ancient, serious and authoritative priestess calling the gods to pay attention to me and give me visions and magic, when in fact I'm just a regular human who loves to give thanks.I don't know if any of it is any good, but I'll probably post it on here anyway, just to see what people think.

Sad dance....

As we are over halfway through the calendar year, it's nice to look back and see all that I've accomplished. Although I haven't crossed off a whole lot on my list, I do have a lot of things that are progressing well, and I'm confident that I will be able to finish those ones by the end of the year.  There are also others that have a fixed date (Midnight Mass, for instance), so I won't be able to cross them off until the those the specific date it happens.  I still have a lot to do, and I know I won't accomplish it all, but the process has been really rewarding, and I'm glad I was so ambitious with my resolutions.

And now, the list as it stands now!

The Resolutions:

1. Write down Resolutions

2. Make at least one blog post a month Progressing Well!

3. Read more books and blogs than you did last year Progressing Well!

4. Pray Daily (I'm already behind on this one, and to remedy that I will have to continue daily prayer into 2013, provided that it doesn't become second nature) Not bad, but not great.

5. Celebrate at least 4 Esbats. Needs Work...

6. Write recreationally at least once a month (excluding blog posts) Not bad, but not great.

7. Create an Altar upstairs (we already have one downstairs, but it was mostly my mother's creation, and I'd like to make one on my own)

8. Stop eating at McDonalds So far, so good!

9. Exercise more Progressing Well!

10. Find my passion Needs Work...

11. Base decisions on what I want, not what I don't want

12. Explore career paths

13. Celebrate all 8 Sabbats (last year we celebrated maybe three) Progressing Well!

14. Volunteer; give of yourself in some way for the greater good

15. Make a donation to a Charity

16. Successfully make jam!

17. Stop obsessing over weight and instead focus on being a healthier you Progressing Well!

18. Do something spontaneous!

19. Go to a gay bar This could be on the agenda for the next girl's night... I'll keep you posted!

20. Learn to knit hats

21. Make a blanket

22. Buy a Macbook Pro (DO IT)

23. Talk to my dad honestly Needs Work...

24. Have an active spiritual life Progressing Well!

25. Go to an Ashram

26. Participate in a Passover Seder or one of the High Holy Days

27. Go to Midnight Mass

28. Make a new friend  Unsure if I have completed this one... but maybe?

29. Start a band/start singing with people in front of an audience

30. Take Kourtney somewhere special

31. Kiss in the rain

32. Learn a new language (Spanish and ASL don't count)

33. Continue my ASL Studies

34. Learn to sleep without the TV on Needs Work...

35. Write a book Needs Work...

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