Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Passover 2014

So I haven't been posting any updates about my journey to Judaism, which is admittedly slow-going but super exciting (to me). Passover was last month, and I was invited to a seder at my friend Bekah's mom's house. I was so excited, but also super nervous. I've been to a seder before, but I was like eight or nine and I barely remember it. I'm learning a lot about Judaism, but I'm still a total novice and the thought of messing things up or saying the wrong thing gives me major anxiety. What if I said a word wrong or did something stupid? Turns out I did both of those things and no one threw me out.

Monday, May 5, 2014

While I've Been Gone

It's been really difficult getting myself to write anything in the last few months. I think it's because I just don't know what to say.

Actually, that's a lie. I have a lot to say, but none of it is particularly inspiring or enlightening (not that anything I've said previously has being either of those things). Most of the things I've been feeling have been anxiety, sadness and grief. Losing my uncle has hit me really hard, and at a time in my life when I'm already in a not so great place. After he died, everything that I was feeling before seemed to be magnified times a thousand. All the anxiety that had been building, the depression, the fear, it exploded after his death. I was hit hard.

Then Kourtney's aunt died, which was hard for her. And then in march my grandma Sue died. So 2014 has not been so great to us so far.